And you don’t see geniuses at relationships on television. I think, like Robin Hanson and others, that if you’re tuned into signaling that’s really helpful. And when I accuse people on Twitter of woke virtue-signaling or SJW signaling I’m being derogatory not because I think that virtue-signaling itself is bad but doing it in a certain way, or unselfconsciously, is bad.
The Mind as a Fitness Indicator?
MATE pulls from hundreds of studies to show what really works on the dating scene. From revealing attractive traits to suggesting strategies for choosing careers with the best mating markets, MATE is an evidence-based, seriously funny playbook for becoming as sexually attractive and romantically successful as possible. Moving beyond the intelligence thesis itself, Miller also argues that females selected males for their kindness and this is the basis for trust and our morality. Miller rightly criticizes kin selection theory when it extends itself in a sloppy seconds sort of way to explain reciprocal altruism. Miller says that kin selection violates its own principles in doing that.
I grew up wealthy — here are the unspoken rules of ‘rich white’ people
In terms of seduction techniques, people are weird about talking about the sexuality of children but this happens all the time. Someone could be ready to slap their kid and the child says, “Mommy, you look so pretty today” and it works. This is teaching children how to get someone out of a bad mood or get on someone’s good side with compliments, which is basically seduction. For my part, I’m incredibly cynical about my own motivations.
They also talk about gratitude & gratefulness (Joe doesn’t have any) and the first week of his new job. Please sign up to our free email list to continue reading. Portions of data on HachetteBookGroup.com are supplied by Books In Print ®.
He also speculates that the reason human beings excel at certain things that do not make it any easier to survive is that these have been “selected” by our ancestors. For instance, the women in your ancestry may have preferred men with good singing voices. Over generations, your people became better and better singers.
And I didn’t know how much karma it was going to have when I commented. I never had any success meeting women while volunteering. Most of the people you meet while volunteering are going to be older and retired. So unless you’re trying Bear411 to break into that septuagenarian dating market; volunteer because you want to help people and not to meet women. Ignoring questions like tone or whether this post belongs on Less Wrong, this specifically is obviously unethical.
The section on mating markets was good; but I was really hoping for more out of it. I just felt like I couldn’t get concise information and that the advice was too broad. I also enjoyed the part where they talk about where you live and why you live there, it got me thinking a lot about my personal situation. I can say that I dont have a particularly good impression of Tucker Max. But Geoffrey Miller definitely knows what he is talking about. This book is just amazing, as it is not about some ridiculous scams.
And if you don’t get a partner, you’ll still get a friend. But that’s also a pretty slow method, so I’m kind of stumped about what to do since both approaches seem to have major flaws. Re “5. Focus on social life and fun”, also seems like a distraction.
She talks about how if you want to get good at business or sport or any skill or craft there are a million mentors and role models you can learn from. But it’s very hard to find role models for relationships. Is that we’re a lot smarter than what we need for survival, and the human mind is a lot like the peacock’s tail. It’s a result of runaway selection, and we’re showing off ostentatiously how smart we are. And women are smart to be able to evaluate intelligence and men’s creativity, so they became as sophisticated.
You probably already knew everyone who might be a potential mate who isn’t your cousin. You knew the tribes over the other hills and who might be in those tribes who is worth raiding or trying to seduce. I think we’re very maladapted to do sustained, rational mate search in these huge mating markets, even though there’s a huge upside to doing that.
